Forty miles out I made a change of mind and turned back towards home, and twenty miles after that I re-reconsidered and pulled over to ensure there would be no further interruptions. In this day and age it's nearly impossible to isolate one's self from the incessant discord, but I tried. Not long ago, it was not difficult to sort the rational from the ridiculous, but it was now, and I decided to take the night off. I cleared my mind and worked hard to conceptualize the very, very worst that could happen. I knew, even out here, this charm could compel the most reluctant physician to smile during a pro bono publico stitch job. She was surprised to see me so elated. I gave detailed accounts of both my trip to barstow last summer, and the ingredients of our mid-morning nutritional shake. I had her riveted and i didn't want it to end before daylight so i showed her my old house in laguna and the hairpin where i rolled my dad's alfa. She told her friend I was an insufferable bore whose self-indulgence was matched only by an unearned, and unrelenting, sense of prominence.